Car Spotlight- Nissan Axxess (1990)

A 1990 Nissan Axxess van featured in two-tone paint
and a hint of rust!
source-onlytruecars.com

The way I describe Nissan's response to the minivan boom of the 1980s is like that dumb nerd you knew in science class.  He would show up fashionably late, give all the wrong answers to the teacher, and whenever he tries to converse with you, you just want to turn around and walk away.  Nissan's first response to the growing demand was the 1987-1990 "Van" (with disastrous results).  Their "other van" (although I personally consider it a tall wagon)  was the Stanza Wagon, which was offered between 1985 and 1988.  As awkward as it looked, the Stanza wagon was noted for being the first minivan to feature two sliding rear doors, as opposed to the the single passenger side sliding door found on many of it's competitors.  Another unique feature was the lack of a b-pillar (that pole thing that separates the front and rear door), which made it ideal for wheelchair-bound individuals.

A Nissan Stanza wagon, which according to some, looks like
a happy meal box.
source-productioncars.com

After a slow, yet respectable three year run, Nissan updated the Stanza wagon by shaving off the right angles (as if they knew the 1990s consumers would have none of that) adding a b-pillar and giving it a new name-Axxess.

The Axxess hit American showrooms in 1990....and then went away by the end of the year.


...see how I was so brief about the Axxess's production run?  That's pretty much all there is to it.  It came and went within 12 months.  But why?  The design was modern, seating was comfortable, inside visibility was large, the price was reasonable, and had dual-sliding rear doors (which competitors STILL have not grown to accept yet).  And how about that NEW NAME!  I mean...yeah, they spelled the name "access" wrong, but by spelling it "axxess" that just makes the van sound more cool!   And not only that, but it was an appropriate name....because you know...it has not one but TWO sliding doors...so the Axxess was very "axxessible"....get it?....get it?  Wait, why are you walking away?

I was a bit confused myself as to why this van wasn't given much of a chance.  Upon looking into this car, the Axxess wasn't even that bad of a car.  Heck, even this guy, who wrote this interesting article about the Stanza wagon bought a fleet of them for use as news vans for a TV station, with huge success (link here).  Like myself, he was unsure as to why the Axxess didn't last in the U.S.  The only negative aspect that I could dig up about it was that the ride was bumpy and the engine was said to be on the loud side.

I figured you were bored, so here's another picture!
source-wikimedia...or wikipedia

I narrowed down 5 reasons for the Axxess's early demise.

1. Competition in the minivan market was VERY STIFF by 1990.  It seemed that every car maker at the time had some sort of minivan to offer (some manufacturers even had more than one van in their lineup).    
2. The Axxess didn't come equipped with a third row back seat (the Stanza wagon had one, but several former owners claimed it could only fit "amputated midgets.")
3.  the Nissan Van disaster made several consumers skeptical of the Axxess's safety.
4. Nobody thinks the name "Axxess" is cool.

The final nail on the coffin for the Axxess actually happened even BEFORE the Axxess debuted.  In the late 1980s, Nissan and Ford entered an agreement to co-develop an all new minivan.  I don't exactly know how the agreement came to be, but my guess is Ford was too lazy to make a new van all by themselves and Nissan was too scared of making another fire-prone van.  So for all of you with ADD or ADHD (or both), I made a montage of the Nissan-Ford partnership!

THE QUEST FOR MERCURY'S VILLAGER

(fade up from black, enter Nissan and Ford from each end of the stage, the year is 1989)

("Girl, you know it's true" by Milli Vanilli is playing in the background)

Ford- Hey Nissan! How goes it?

Nissan- Oh, it sucks!  People are yelling at us because our Nissan Van keeps frying people!  And we're being made fun of because our Stanza van looks like a happy meal box!

Ford- Really?  Did you do anything to fix it?  Like, recalls and stuff?

Nissan- Yeah, we threw a lot of shit at it to stop doing what it's doing....but none of it's working!

Ford- I hear you on that.  People have been bitching at us because our minivan, the Aerostar is"underpowered" and are "blowing head gaskets" pfft...if this is such a problem for them than why do people keep buying them?  After all, we just overtook GM and their dumb Astro van in sales.  If we keep this up, we'll finally catch up to Chrysler and beat them at their own game!

Nissan- Chrysler? Screw those guys!

Ford- You know what we should do? We should join forces and build the best fuckin' van ever. Think about it...you need a minivan that won't suck, and we could always use another vehicle in our lineup.  I'm sure our Mercury division would be happy to have a van of their own!  With your expertise in engineering reliable cars and our expertise in knowing what the American public wants in a van, we could take old man Iacocca and his Caravan to the cleaners!

Nissan- Okay!

(both hi-five)

Nissan- OH SHIT! I forgot, we already have a van in the works!

Ford- Wait...what?

Nissan- Yeah, a while back, someone mentioned that the Stanza van is getting redesigned, but I haven't heard much about it...except it's going to be called the "access" and it's going to be spelled a-x-x-e-s-s.

Ford (with a puzzled look)- ...why?

Nissan- Apparently, the name is supposed to sound edgy and cool and shit...

Ford-  Well, if we're gonna make this new van epic, we'll have to spend a lot of time researching and developing, which could take a few years.  You can use your "Axxess" as a placeholder until the final product is ready!

Nissan- Sounds like a plan!  So what should we do first?

Ford- I don't know...burn stuff?

Nissan- Sounds like fun!  I have just the van for that!

(both exit stage hand in hand)

(fade to black)

THREE YEARS LATER...

(fade up, living room of Nissan's living room, where he is on the couch in the fetal position, phone in hand.  Milli Vanilli music still playing in the background)

Nissan- Uh...hey Ford.

Ford- What do you need Nissan?

Nissan- Well...let me ask you this, we've been working on this new van for quite a while...when did you say we should have this van done?

Ford (annoyed) I told you already, we'll have something ready for the '92 Detroit Auto Show....so two years!  Still got some shit to iron out.  After all, this van has to be epic...remember?

Nissan- I know, I know...It's just that the Axxess is not doing as well as we thought...they're collecting dust on the lots and we're losing money on the ones we HAVE sold.

Ford- Hmm...Okay, how about this, since this van is supposed to be epic, we should give it an epic introduction!  Ditch the Axxess and use this time to build up media hype for the new van!

Nissan (stands up)- Once again, you have solved all my problems!  I will pull the plug on that pile tomorrow!

Ford- And just one more thing before I go..

Nissan- What's that?

Ford- Why the HELL are you still listening to Milli Vanilli?

Nissan (slams phone down)

(fade to black)


Holy crap...did I just write a play?  Wow...  Anyways, I'm almost certain that 99% of that story isn't true (but did you find it entertaining?)  So here's what came out of the Ford-Nissan partnership:

1993 Nissan Quest
credit-wikipedia

                       

...And of course, Ford had to have their own version

1993 Mercury Villager
credit-wikipedia

Was the Nissan Quest a good van? Yes.  Did it put a sustainable dent in Caravan and Voyager sales?  Not quite.  But nevertheless, many can attest that the Quest was a big improvement over the Axxess, with it's standard third-row backseat, additional options, and surplus of parts from both Nissan AND Ford dealers.

Anyways, let me stop myself right there before this post becomes more about the Nissan Quest than the Axxess.  

So to pretty much sum it up, the Axxess was more or less a footnote in Nissan's history book.  I will point out however, that this "one-year-wonder" only happened in the United States.  Thats right, everything I said up until this point was about the American-bound Axxess only.  Citizens of the Great White North got to enjoy the Axxess for five more years, mostly because it was ideal for shipping maple syrup and hockey pucks (okay, that's also a lie, Canadians are great people).

What's my personal take on the Nissan Axxess, you say?  Well, believe it or not, I am proud to say that I own one myself!  Thats right, I am the proud owner of a silver 1990 Nissan Axxess.  From firsthand experience, it is definitely a quirky car.  I bought it at a swap-meet in 2006 for the ridiculously low price of 50 cents!  It's silver and even came with some cheesy 90s graphics on the side (although some of it is starting to chip away due to wear and tear).  The ride is smooth, yet the seats are LITERALLY made of plastic.  The steering wheel is on the right side of the dashboard for some reason, so going through the drive through is out of the question.  The best part?  I don't even need to put gas in it!  To this day, I cannot fathom why nobody cared for this car.  I mean...who wouldn't want a car that didn't need gas to run?


Here's a picture of it...

Whoever at Matchbox that came up with the idea of making a die-cast Axxess
deserves a cookie...

Car Spotlight- Volkswagen Fox (1987-1993)

Look at that Foxy car!
photo credit- germancarforum.com

The year was 1999, I was six year old at the time.  I just finished playing a T-Ball game.  I can't remember if my team won or lost (nor did I care, since I just played with the infield sand most of the time anyway).  My dad and I were walking through the parking lot when I saw what I thought was a VW Jetta.  I asked my dad what he thought of "that Jetta over there."  He took one look at it and said that it wasn't a Jetta, but "one of those crappy VW Foxes."  Right as he said that, this really tall guy walking toward it stopped and gave us this really nasty look.  We then jumped into our '91 Camry and took off.

Sixteen years later, I looked back at what happened that day and thought to myself "What was so bad about the Volkswagen Fox that gave my dad that conclusion?"  If it was so bad that my non-car guy father would even have a negative opinion about it, then there MUST be something interesting about this thing...

Well...I'm nowhere near my dad as I'm writing this, so I can't really ask his opinion, so you could say I'm not going anywhere with this....


ANYWAYS...

The Fox was imported to the States from Brazil (where it was known as the Gol), and it sat at the bottom of the VW totem pole.  Some might argue that it was the spiritual successor to the original Beetle, because like the Beetle, the Fox was a very basic car.  There was no automatic transmission, power steering, and in the early days, no glovebox (although a lot of these things were options on other cars as well).

There were three versions of the Fox available during it's six year run, a 4-door sedan, a 2-door coupe, and a 2-door wagon (why there was no 4-door wagon is beyond me).  Maybe there was a door shortage at the factory?  While I thought a 2-door wagon was a pretty neat concept, not many people felt the same way, as the wagon was axed after 1990.

A VW Fox "shooting brake"
photo credit-germancarsforsaleblog.com

*side note, two door wagons are actually common in Europe, and called "shooting brakes" (because they were ideal for hunting)

One of several internet memes that poke
fun at VW's engine problems
source- quick memes

Now, going back to whether or not the Fox was a lousy car...yes it was...but then again, neither was any other VW from the late 80s to the early 2000s.  This is because car manufacturing got very expensive in Germany, so VW outsourced a large portion of it's North American production to Mexico and Brazil, where it was cheaper to not only build and ship the cars, but also cheaper to pay the workers.  A consequence of this was the build quality also became "cheap,"  as several VW cars were plagued with peeling paint, body panels that would fall off, and engine issues that were difficult to diagnose.  In fact, the engine issues were so common that there were several internet memes that would go along the lines of  "if your VW's engine light is off, then there's something wrong with it."

In the case of the Fox, it was just the sheer fact that it was the "bottom of the line car".  The reason why it lacked so many options and was made of cheap materials was to keep the sticker price down.

The ownership experience of the Fox is relatively mixed.  There were some who praised it for it's simplicity, good milage, and overall "being fun to drive." Others lamented it for it's build quality, poor fit and finish, and underpowered engine (although my argument for that is why would you buy it if it was too slow?)

During the Fox's "run", VW sold about 174,000 sedans and wagons (source) .  By 1992, Foxes began to collect dust on the VW lots, and was eventually erased from the lineup in 1993. (perhaps due to the fact it looked too similar to the Jetta)

Aside from that one time at the baseball field, I haven't really seen any VW Foxes around (or maybe I have, but kept confusing them for a Jetta.)  Considering the fact that I haven't seen any in recent memory pretty much tells me how reliable they were.

Car Spotlight- Buick Somerset (1985-1987)

A 1985 Buick Somerset, in all it's 80s glory.
photo credit- wikiwand

The Buick Skylark, a nameplate that has been a staple at Buick since 1953.  The Skylark was a common choice for the white collar working man and his family.  Like any other Buick, it also appealed to the average granny than needed it to get to and from church and the laxative store.  The Skylark sold well for Buick for several years.

...then came the 1980s...

In 1980, Buick applied the Skylark nameplate to an upscale version of Chevy's infamous Citation (more on that here).  To make a long story short, the Citation based Skylark left a bitter taste on many loyal Buick customer's tongue.  So when it came time to redesign the Skylark for 1985, someone at Buick felt it was time to phase out the Skylark nameplate with the outgoing model in a typical GM move to seem "fresh."

The name of the Skylark's replacement was called the Somerset Regal...okay, for those of you who aren't Buick historians, there is nothing "fresh" about that name, as Buick had another car called the Regal.  In fact just a few years prior to the Somerset Regal's debut, there was a trim package for the Regal called the "Somerset"...

Anyway, the Somerset Regal debuted for the 1985 model year and came in a two-door configuration only as well as a choice of two engines. The Somerset Regal shared it's platform with Oldsmobile's Calais and Pontiac's Grand Am (collectively called the GM N-cars)

The only thing that made the Somerset Regal stand out from it's Pontiac and Oldsmobile in-laws was the placement of the radio, which was mounted in a separate pod that sat on top of the AC/heater controls.  It looked as if Buick forgot all about it when they were designing the dashboard, and some engineer was all like "Aw crap! we forgot the radio! Uhh... lets throw it in right here!"

This is a factory-installed radio in a 1986 Buick Somerset.
Have fun trying to figure out how to swap in an aftermarket one!
Source-curbside classics.com

After the Somerset Regal's first year on the market, GM added four-door models to it's N-car lineup.  This may seem like a good idea, as the 1985 sales figures for the Somerset Regal were less than what GM was expecting.  So one would think that a 4-door Somerset Regal would help give the nameplate some more recognition...right?  Here's the thing...when the 4-door debuted in 1986, Buick didn't call it the Somerset Regal....they called it the Skylark!  That's right, Buick not only gave a 4-door version of a car that already exists a completely different name, but they named it after a car that Buick phased out two years before.  In a half-assed attempt to prevent confusion among buyers, Buick changed the name of the two door model from the Somerset Regal....to just simply "Somerset."

From here, Buick's game plan for marketing the Skylark and Somerset was that the Skylark would be marketed toward old people who tend to carpool to bingo night.  The Somerset was marketed as a more upscale "personal coupe," being marketed toward wealthy old people wanting to drive to the pharmacy to pick up their laxatives in style.  

Here's why this didn't work (for the Somerset, at least).

1. The 2.5L 4-banger engine (aka the "Iron Duke") was considered too underpowered and noisy for an "upscale car." A 3.0L V6 could be had as an option, but nobody bothered to look into that.
2. The digital instrument cluster that was stuffed into the Somerset was notorious for draining alternators (probably another thing Buick forgot about when developing the car.)
3. Rich old people typically don't spend their money on small GM cars, regardless of how "fancy" it may be. 
4. The Skylark was cheaper, since it didn't have all that luxury crap that made the Somerset more expensive.
5. It's a GM car from the 1980s...so don't anticipate any high expectations from the fit and finish department.

There may have been more reasons, but the point is that Buick dropped the Somerset name after the 1987 model year and renamed the car the "Skylark coupe"...which is what GM should have done in the first place.  

A 1988 Buick Skylark coupe...see the difference compared
to the Somerset?  I don't either
source: Orlandod87 on CarDomain

To basically sum it up, Buick may have wanted to replace the Skylark, but were hesitant to do so.  So they brought out the Somerset in two door form only as a way to "test the waters" if buyers would warm up to the new nameplate...which they didn't, so Buick phased-in the Skylark nameplate and brushed "Somerset" under the rug only three years after being introduced.  I'm sure the car would have done just fine if GM would've just kept the Skylark name to begin with, and I think GM probably knew that, too.  

...Oh, one last thing.  I found this Buick Somerset commercial on YouTube...I can name several cars that I would rather have than a Somerset. 

A Brief history of the 1996-1999 Ford Taurus...was the design really ahead of it's time?

"Taurus.  It's the North American Car with the looks and the feel you've never seen before...It's a personal car that's exactly what we've been looking for!" (link)

That was the jingle Ford used to describe it's revolutionary Taurus mid-sized sedan and wagon when it was introduced in 1986.  And revolutionary it was, as it's design was unlike all the other cars being sold at the time.  It was all a very risky design for Ford as the total cost for the car's development was well over $1 billion.   Had the Taurus been a failure, Ford would have REALLY been in deep trouble.  Luckily it wasn't as in it's first year of production, Ford sold 200,000 Tauruses...yep it was definitely a game changer!  Eventually, it became the best-selling passenger car in America.  The Taurus continued it's winning ways throughout the early 1990s.  A re-design of the Taurus in 1992 further solidified the car's dominance on the American car market.

In an attempt to repeat the original Taurus's success by being like no other car out there, Ford once again thought outside of the bun (sorry, I'm eating Taco Bell as I'm writing this) when designing an all-new Taurus.  The new car was much more rounder than it's predecessor, and by that, I mean it was WAY MUCH MORE ROUNDER than the previous Taurus. Take a look at the two cars below.  Both are Ford Taurus's and they're only one model year apart.  Not a single line was shared between the two cars.

1995 Ford Taurus
image credit-GTcarLot.com

1996 Ford Taurus
image credit-jordanmotors.com

Can you count the number of circles on the dashboard?

Now this one is for you Chevy and Dodge fanboys.  Have any of you ever heard of the Ford joke regarding the emblem and the phrase "well...at least they circled the problem" Well, the 1996 Taurus was literally FULL of circles.  Everything about the car was round.  The windows were round, the lights were round, the shifter was round, the trim pieces were round. EVERYTHING WAS ROUND!  One would think that the inspiration for the design was the Ford emblem itself.  I'm willing to bet that there isn't a single right angle on the car.

The 3rd generation Taurus debuted in late 1995 as a 1996 model to generally positive reviews from the press.  The public however, was more lukewarm to the new Taurus, as after only one year on the market, the Taurus lost it's best-selling car status to the Toyota Camry.  Some would later dub this itineration of the Taurus "the goldfish car" or "the submarine." It wasn't long before the majority of Taurus sales went to fleets and rental companies.  I bet if you were standing in line at the local Enterprise or Hertz desk in the late 90s and early 2000s, you would most likely hear other mutter "Please don't give me a Taurus, Please don't give me a Taurus..."

Ford realized their mistake and quickly restyled the Taurus in 2000 to make it more "conservative."  But nevertheless, the damage was done.  The Taurus was no longer a "competitive car."  Several car people even go so far to say that the 3rd gen Taurus was what led to the downfall (and immediate revival) of the Taurus nameplate.

Now most car people dismiss the 1996-'99 Taurus as a "game changer" done wrong.  The way I see it is that Ford wanted to be revolutionary just like the original Taurus was, but the end result just simply didn't sit well with the public.  What people don't realize is that the Taurus really was ahead of the times...at least from a design standpoint.

So let's fast forward to today and look at some mainstream family cars. (Although by today's standards, they're quite normal), and compare them to the design of the 1996-'99 Taurus. (all photos courtesy of Wikipedia under public domain)

#1-Hyundai Sonata

#2-Kia Optima

#3 Ford Fusion

#4-Toyota Prius

Now, many of you would argue that the cars I listed would be "10 times better than the fishbowl Taurus in for x amount of reasons..." And I would probably agree with you.  However consider this,  say the Taurus debuted 15 years later than it did, and had all the modern amenities that a typical 2011 car would have, yet still retained it's ovid shape.  Do you think it would fit right in with the competition better than it would have in 1996? 

Car Spotlight-Dodge Dynasty (1988-1993)

The entire car industry (specifically the design departments) was flipped upside down when they got their first look at the 1986 Ford Taurus.  While the average 1980s car looked like a moving box with edges so sharp they can give you cuts, the Taurus was very aerodynamic and futuristic, with rounded edges, a comfortable interior, and even a digital dashboard to further give owners the impression they were driving "the car of the future."

Meanwhile, across town over at Chrysler, top executives and engineers were scoffing at the Taurus, claiming the car was "too radical" for the public to chew and swallow.  They assumed that consumers would continue to prefer traditional boxy cars that has been a standard for American cars since the late 70s.

To "compete" with the new Taurus, Chrysler took their "fail safe" K-platform, enlarged it to appear mid-sized, and slapped all these boxy panels on it. (perhaps as a middle finger to Ford)  The end result was the Dynasty sedan.


So what was the verdict?

Why don't you take a look at these two pictures...one is the Dynasty and the other is the Ford Taurus.  Both are the same model year and priced about the same.  






...Yeah, it seems that at arrival, the Dynasty already looked like a twenty year old car.  Despite it's inferiority design wise, the Dynasty still found it's group of buyers.  These people include:

• families who haven't exactly warmed up to the Taurus's aerodynamic design
• people who refuse to buy anything that isn't a Chrysler product
• OLD PEOPLE!

Now with that being said, the Dynasty wasn't really that bad of a car (although it does like to eat automatic transmissions for breakfast).  One thing I hear that owners like about the Dynasty is it's smooth ride, thanks to it's innovative front struts that reduced ride harshness, as well as seats that felt like the couch in your grandma's living room.  To be honest, I would consider the Dynasty as one of the last "land yachts" to be sold to the public.  

In the long run, Chrysler was dead wrong about aeronautical cars being a fad, as the Dynasty (as well as most of Chrysler's boxy cars) was phased out in 1993 and replaced by the super sleek Intrepid.  

Link to a bunch of old people explaining why they like their Dynasty 

Link to an incredibly hot chick selling Dodge Dynasty hubcaps

Link to a bunch of teenagers making a Dynasty fly!

Car Spotlight- Kia Borrego (2009)

I have seen three Borrego's in my lifetime and all of them were
in this copper-orange color.
(photo credit-car and driver)

Okay so picture this, it's 2009.  The housing market was collapsing, banks were failing, businesses were closing, the war in the Middle East was dragging on, and gas prices were sharply increasing despite starting the year at under $2.00 a gallon.

At this time, the auto industry was facing record-low sales as consumers were wary of making such a huge investment in a car that may or may not even be made anymore.  Those who did get a car (most likely on risky credit) were buying gas-sipping compacts, under-powered minivans or those DARN HYBRID cars.

So how did Kia Motors of South Korea respond to this new desire for a fuel-efficient family hauler? With a body-on-frame full size SUV that gets around 16 miles to the gallon...

When the truck first came out, I didn't understand why Kia chose to sell this car.  They already had similar sized crossover SUV called the Sorento that had more or less the same features and capacities...but at a smaller sticker price.  I was not alone, as I remember reading an article by Motor Trend where the staff was given one as a long term test vehicle, and they came to a similar conclusion.

Despite being the wrong vehicle at the wrong time, the Borrego wasn't bad for what it was.  It seats up to seven people, can tow up to 7000 lbs, and the maneuverability was pretty good for it's size.  It would have made a decent vehicle for road trips up to the cabin, towing the pontoon boat, or (realistically) ideal for rich housewives who like to take up more than one parking space at the Sam's Club.

But again...it was a vehicle that was fifteen years behind the times.  It was a truck that no one really asked for, especially in this economy.  The Borrego was pulled from the U.S Kia lineup after barely a year on the market.  Production of the Borrego continued however, as the truck is still being sold in middle-eastern nations where gas and oil are about as common as urine.    

  

Car spotlight- Ford Festiva (1988-1993)

The Festiva was so basic, that having a passenger-side mirror
was considered an option...

The car I'm talking about today should not be confused with the 1978-1980 and 2011-present Ford Fiesta.  No, this is the Ford Festiva (fes-teev-ah), a completely different small car.  Imagine the word "festive" and replace the "e" with an "a" (just like when Oldsmobile replaced the  last "e" in Achieve with an "a" to get this depressing car).

In the mid 80s, Ford was on top of the world.  Their Escort "world car" was selling plentifully around the world, the game-changing Taurus mid-sized sedan was turning heads everywhere, and Ford was well into development of another vehicle that will turn the car industry upside down (the Explorer)  Yes, it was a great time to be a Ford dealer.  Around this time, the was a dramatic increase in college graduates looking to buy their first car or their first "new" car.  Looking to capitalize on this new demographic, Ford went ahead and offered a simple and affordable car called the Festiva.

Because Ford was pretty exhausted with developing the Escort and Taurus, as well as having their hands full with the Explorer, Ford pulled a GM move by dumping the responsibility of developing and assembling this new car to their Japanese partners, Mazda and Kia.

Gotta love that optional air conditioner!
And Get a load of that automatic seat
belt!
(photo credit-moibibiki.com)

The origins of the Festiva itself is actually quite confusing.  The car was originally developed by Mazda as the 121 sub-compact and was marketed mainly toward those who lived in city settings (specifically Tokyo) where cars are taxed based on size and dimensions.  Mazda would then enter a contract with Kia Motors of South Korea to assemble the 121 and sell it as the Kia Pride.  When Ford came along and asked to sell the car in the United States, it would be the Korean derivative that would wear the Ford emblem.  So whenever someone in America pops open the hood or look closely at the V.I.N plate, it will say "Manufactured in South Korea by Kia Motors."

The Festiva went on sale in the U.S in 1988 and sold fairly well.  Like Ford had hoped, the Festiva sold well among college graduates and new drivers.  The Festiva was also quite popular with individuals who had long commutes, as the car got very good gas mileage (35 city/42 highway).  The only drawbacks to the cars were it's laughably small wheels that wore out frequently and it's very poor crash test ratings (but don't worry, Ford put motorized seat-belts in the Festiva so that nobody forgot to buckle up!)

The Festiva sold well enough for Ford to keep the Festiva through the 1993 model year.  At this point, the vehicle underwent a major re-design.  Because the new Festiva looked completely different from it's predecessor, Ford decided at the last second to change the name to "Aspire."  To sum up that car as briefly as I can, many people agree that it was probably the worst possible name to give that particular car...

Even after it was re-designed, several markets continued to sell the original version of the Festiva, specifically in emerging markets.  Kia sold the Pride virtually unchanged until 2000.  China sold their own version of the Festiva as the "Donfeng Yueda" in the 1990s and early 2000s.  Iranian car-maker S.A.I.P.A STILL assembles and sells several different variants of the Festiva to this day, including a 5-door hatchback, 4-door sedan, station wagon, and even a pickup (why anyone would buy a Festiva to haul things is beyond me.  I bet the towing capacity of one is pretty laughable).

An Iran-built SAIPA pickup truck at the Factory. Even the people
that built it looks as if they don't understand the point of making
a pickup truck based off a Festiva...
(photo credit-Technically Jurisprudence.blogspot.com)

And if you thought a pick-up Festiva rose eyebrows, there was an unofficial "Festiva SHO" or "SHOgun."  California-based Special Editions Inc, a coach builder took seven Festivas and mounted the 3.0L DOHC V6 typically found in the Ford Taurus SHO in the Festiva.  Along with the engine swap, Special Editions also widened the wheel displacement (to prevent rollovers) and added a unique body kit to differentiate the SHOgun from regular Festivas.  Jay Leno owns SHOgun #3 and you can see a video about that one here.  I read an article on Leno's official website (for which I couldn't get the link on here for some reason) that this was the car he drove to his first day of hosting the Tonight Show back in 1992.    

Jay Leno with his 1990 Festiva "SHOgun." He even went
ahead and added NOS to the engine...well then!
(photo credit-flatout.com.br)

Car spotlight- Jeep Comanche (1986-1992)

1988 Comanche with the "Eliminator" trim
photo credit-Hemmings Motor News

There has always been a pattern when it comes to introducing small trucks and S.U.V's.  An automaker usually introduces a pickup truck one year, and an S.U.V variant would then follow the next year.  This was not the case for Jeep.

In 1984, American Motors introduced the Cherokee compact SUV, which was innovative for being offered in a 4-door configuration rather than just having two doors like GM and Ford were doing.  Realizing how big the compact pickup truck market was becoming, AMC chose to offer a pickup version of its Cherokee.  

Called the Comanche, the truck was introduced in 1986 at a critical time.  American Motors was in the midst of sinking into bankruptcy, and the only thing keeping it afloat was it's Jeep division.  So in a way, the Comanche was a good way to add in some extra cash.

One thing that car historians tended to overlook was how powerful these trucks can be.  While the Ford Ranger and Chevy S-10 pickups were struggling to crank 150 horsepower from their catalytic-converter strangling engines, Jeep introduced a new 4.0 liter Inline 6 engine equipped with fuel injection (which at the time was a new way to transfer fuel).  This made the truck not only more powerful, but also more fuel efficient (but then again it's still a truck, so the milage still sucked).

One thing I find unique about this truck was the way Jeep labeled their trim levels.  On a typical car, and we'll use the Toyota Corolla as an example.  To differentiate each of their models, Toyota used two and three letter combos such as "CE," "S" or "XR." (have no idea if any of these words stand for anything).  Jeep used more conventional, if not, more exciting words to describe it's various Comanche models, such as Pioneer, Chief, Laredo, Olympic (for the 1988 Seoul games) and my favorite one, "Base"

Even though the Comanche may very well have been the most modern truck at the time to wear the Jeep badge, the timing couldn't have been worse, as after just one year on the market, American Motors went under and all their assets were bought up by the Chrysler Corporation.  At this time, Chrysler's Dodge division introduced it's own mid-sized pickup, the Dakota.  So basically, what was meant to be the Comanche's main competitor was now it's step sibling.

Couldn't find a good image of the Comanche's interior.  So I
found this image of the Cherokee SUV (which is more or less
the same thing)

The Comanche and the Dakota ended up being sold side by side at the same dealership.  Even though the Comanche had several advantages over the Dakota, the Comanche never really took off and pretty much sat in the shadows of the Dakota.  This was due mostly in part to the Dakota's lower sticker price and Chrysler's efforts to make Dodge it's "truck" brand and Jeep, it's "SUV" brand.  The Comanche has grown to be so much of a nuisance that dealers were begging Chrysler to pull it from the lineup.

After limping along for several years, the Comanche's death clock ran out in 1992 after only a few thousand trucks were sold the previous year, becoming the last pickup truck to wear the Jeep badge of honor (insert patriotic music here...)
 

 

Car Spotlight- Oldsmobile Achieva (1992-1998)

A boring car in a boring color.

Oldsmobile was always remembered as being "your fathers car" or "your buddy Mike's first car after granny got thrown into the old folk's home."  And by the 1990s...it was still that way.  Just the name "Oldsmobile" can be a dead giveaway to being a boring car meant for old people.

The Achieva was no different from the rest of the Oldsmobile family at the time.  One thing that confuses me the most was where Olds got the name.  It sounds like someone sneezed as they were pitching the name to some top GM executives, and the name stuck...

Like most GM sedans at the time, the Achieva was just another half-hearted attempt to fill a void in a market segment.  Sure, one could get an Achieva with two doors and a stick-shift, but what kind of old person would buy that?  Even the commercials for it were uninspiring... I mean...who would think  that spending most of a commercial showing a bar graph and not the car itself would convince people to buy this car?

The answer to that was well...old people.  Old people who have been driving Oldsmobiles for decades. The Achieva was the car that they bought after retirement, and all the kids have moved out.   At this point, the only places these people would need to go to are the grocery store and church.  Even today, I still see Achieva's on Craigslist with under 100,000 miles.

After almost 90 years of building cars for Grandpa,  Oldsmobile finally realized that they aren't going anywhere if they continue selling such uninspiring cars like the Achieva.  So after selling most of their inventory of 1998 Achieva's to rental fleets, Oldsmobile discontinued the car along with some of it's other well-known but tired nameplates such as the Eighty-Eight, Ninety-Eight, and Cutlass.

Oldsmobile would then focus on making cars that were designed by European engineers...because THAT is what convinces people top buy cars...right?  Well, apparently not, because GM would kill the Oldsmobile brand in 2004 due to low sales and the fact that GM already had several other marques that could easily fill in the void that Olds left behind.    



  

Car Spotlight-Suzuki Kizashi (2010-2013)

2011 Kizashi Sport Limited
photo credit-Super Car Club

Never had I ever heard of a car that sounded more Japanese than the Suzuki Kizashi.  Just say the name to yourself..."Kizashi"...just listening to yourself pronounce that word sounds like something someone would mutter during a fight with a samurai (the Japanese warrior, not the Jeep-looking truck from the late 80s that tipped over all the time).  According to the car's Wikipedia, the word "Kizashi" translates to "something great is coming."  That was the mentality Suzuki had when they introduced the vehicle to the public in 2010.  The Kizashi was meant to usher in a new era or "rebirth" if you want to put it in another way, for Suzuki's car division.

Prior to this, the Suzuki lineup consisted of the SX4 compact hatch and sedan, the trusty but outdated Grand Vitara SUV and it's extended variant, the XL7, and the Equator pick-up (which is more or less a Nissan Frontier with a Suzuki badge.)  Suzuki also offered two sedans, the Forenza and the Verona.  These cars were built by Daewoo Motors of South Korea.  The Forenza and Verona gained a reputation of not being the most reliable cars ever built. (see my post about the Daewoo-built LeMans and Daewoo's attempt at selling their own cars in the United States)  The Kizashi was Suzuki's way of saying "Hey, we're starting the new decade with a clean slate and an all-new car!" hence the source of the vehicle's name.

The Kizashi was definitely a forward-thinking car.  Even though it only came with one engine to choose from (a 2.4L 4 cylinder), consumers did have the option of having one with a 6-speed manual transmission, which was unusual as manual transmissions are becoming less and less common on U.S roads.  A CVT automatic transmission was also available on the Kizashi (but I would avoid the CVT transmission at all costs...REGARDLESS of brand).  Suzuki even offered an all-wheel-drive Kizashi, which could be placed in the same  size category as the Subaru Impreza and Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution.

interior of a Suzuki Kizashi
photo credit-thoughtyoumightask.com

The car was very well received by the press, who commended Suzuki for reinventing themselves and distancing themselves from the lousy Daewoo's it replaced.  Automotive review site Edmunds compared the Kizashi to similar sized European cars such as the VW Jetta and Volvo S40 in both performance and looks (full Edmunds review here).  The durability and reliability of the Kizashi was also proven to be good when writers from Motor Trend Magazine drove two Kizashi's (and an Equator pickup to haul supplies) from Japan to Los Angeles via Siberia, Alaska, and Canada. (link)

So one would think that an all new car that got such praise from the press would sell like hotcakes, right?...RIGHT?

While the Kizashi may have looked promising to Suzuki, the Kizashi was a victim of bad timing.  The car debuted in the midst of one of the worst economic recessions the world has seen since the 1940s.  At this time, several consumers were hurt financially and faced foreclosure of their homes, repossession of their cars, and literally drowning in debt.  The recession was especially bad for automakers, who ended up losing so much money that they had to get on their knees and begged their governments for bailout money.  Due to their already small and fragile presence in the U.S, Suzuki was pretty much crushed by the recession sledgehammer.

Another problem was that Suzuki was facing a shrinking dealer network.  Even before the Kizashi's release, dealers and consumers were wary if not, unsure of the brand's future.  Due to quality concerns with the Forenza and Verona, Suzuki left kind of a bitter taste on consumers tongues.  Over time, several dealers were dumping their Suzuki franchises, making it harder and harder to buy a Kizashi.

By 2013, a strong Japanese yen, a weak model offering, and a continuously shrinking dealer network forced Suzuki Motors of America into bankruptcy and out of business, killing the Kizashi in the process (but motorcycle and ATV production remained, thankfully)

My personal reflection of the the Kizashi was that it was an obscure car from an obscure brand with an obscure name (damn...I should buy one!)  It definitely had potential to being a serious contender in the American compact car segment.  And I know that first hand as I had the privilege of driving one.

STORY TIME PEOPLE...SIT THE HELL DOWN! 

It was January of 2013 and I was at work cleaning rental cars.  A blizzard swept through town the night before so the lot was still covered in snow.   I was literally digging out cars out of the snow when I "struck silver" (by that, I mean found a silver AWD Kizashi covered in snow).  I didn't recall ever seeing one come across the shop before.  To be honest, this was perhaps the first time I have ever seen a Kizashi up close, as the last Suzuki car dealership in my town closed up two years prior.

Upon finding out it had AWD, I stopped digging it out and hopped inside to see what it could do.  Lo and behold, the Kizashi managed to climb out of it's snowy grave like it was nothing, which is saying a lot for a car with a low ground clearance.  Edmunds was spot on with saying how well the car handled, even in the snow.

Cleaning the car's interior was also fairly easy as the dirt, snow and "mystery stains" left by the previous renter came out without much effort.  The interior itself did look like it was inspired by European engineering.  In fact it even SMELLED like it was designed by european engineers (but that was because there was a melted Toblerone in the glovebox next to the heater vents).

The only critique I had about that car was that it took me almost 20 minutes to figure out how to open the gas lid.  There was no lip to pull it open and I couldn't find a release lever.  Turns out you had to push the opposite end of the door to open it.  Upon figuring this out, I reacted to the method with a "WHAT THE HELL!"

A silver Kizashi similar to the one I drove, only mine had South
Dakota plates on it.
photo credit-All Suzuki Images

               

Car Spotlight-Toyota Paseo (1991-1997)

1991-1994 Toyota Paseo

Lately, it seems that Toyota hasn't been really good at "appealing" to the youth-oriented market.  Yes, there's Scion with their edgy xB box-mobile and tC and FR-S sports coupes (along with some forgettable cars like the xA, xD, and iQ).  But even then, it seems that whenever I see any of those cars on the road, it's always and older person driving them, most likely so they can prove to their alienated children that they can still be "hip"

(sorry, had to get that rant off my shoulder, not a fan of Scion...)

But anyway, let's go back in time to the early 1990s, when Toyota had a sports car for every demographic.

• Celica-which was popular with single women that wanted to be edgy, but didn't want anything  too intimidating. 
• MR-2-a mid-engined car for all the track enthusiasts that are bent on modifying them to beat out Mazda Miata's at the next track meet.
• Supra-yank yank...yank it away!

A Toyota Tercel, which the Paseo is
derived from.

The fourth and final sporty Toyota is the topic of todays post.  The Paseo was well....uhh.....yeah.  For a while, it was hard for me to justify the reason for the Paseo's existence.  So what is the Paseo you say?  Well, its basically a Toyota Tercel (which is more or less the Echo/Yaris of the 1990s) with a sports-like shell on top of it.  The interior, dashboard, engine, and transmission choices were identical to the Tercel.

So what was the point of the Paseo?  Well, the Paseo was Toyota's bottom-feeder of sports cars.  It was for people who wanted a sport car but couldn't afford something fast, so they bought this.  It was also a car that parent's bought their spoiled daughter for their sweet 16th birthday (On a more serious note, people who wanted good milage with sporty looks also bought a Paseo).   Despite having a considerably narrow target market, the Paseo did live up to it's Toyota heritage by being very dependable and was very simple to own and maintain.

1996-1997 Paseo convertible
photo credit-edmunds.com

After being on the market for four years, the Paseo underwent an update in 1995 to concede with it's Tercel sibling's major redesign.  The Paseo looked more modern and up to date than it's predecessor.  Toyota even went the extra mile and added a Paseo Convertible in 1996.  Right when things were looking up for the Paseo, Toyota removed the Paseo and Tercel from the market in 1997 so Toyota would make way for it's odd-looking Echo compact (and no, there was no Paseo version of that).

Personally I knew of one person who had a Paseo, and it was a neighbor of mine who always pronounced it "Pa-say-YO,"  adding extra emphasis to the last two letters.  There was also a co-worker of mine who previously owned several Paseo's.  He was the kind of guy that moved often and told me that he would always get a Paseo whenever he moved.

Link to an old car review show hosted by a guy with a thick Australian accent reviewing the Paseo
Link to a Paseo commercial from 1994.  Trust me, how could you NOT want to buy this car after reading this!

Car Spotlight-Lincoln Blackwood (2002)

Was there ever a time where you would be out driving and you come across a giant pickup truck that's covered in chrome, has leather seats, and has rims that looked like it costed as much as the truck itself?  Chances are the first thing that went through your mind was "I bet that guy never uses that truck to haul things." To a lot of people (including myself) the pickup truck is meant to haul and tow things.  They were meant to get bumps and bruises as the years went on with little to no worry.  Well, the Lincoln Blackwood pretty much changed all that.

By the late 1990s, the SUV boom has gotten to the point where luxurious automakers such as Mercedes-Benz and Cadillac were hopping on the bandwagon.  Ford's Lincoln division entered the SUV market with the Navigator, a fancied up version of the Ford Expedition.  The Navigator was an instant success, becoming very popular with upscale clubbers, limousine companies and especially celebrities and their die-hard fans.

Ford wanted to capitalize on the success of the Navigator so someone on Lincoln's design committee came up with the wise idea of making the Navigator into a pickup truck.  The Blackwood was the end result.

Now just by looking at this post's title pretty much gives you an idea as to how that panned out.    Rather than have me explain WHY the Blackwood was such a flop, let me just list off some of it's features (and lack of):

• The bed was converted into a trunk that was lined with velvet
• You can get it in any color you want, as long as it was black and had extra chrome (a shout out to Henry Ford...I guess)
• there was no 4x4 or choice of multiple engines to choose from.
• the single option that can be had on the Blackwood was a dashboard navigation system, taken from the Navigator!...yeah I didn't think you would get the pun.
• All this could be had for the ridiculous price of $52,000!

So after reading the list above, would YOU buy a Lincoln Blackwood?  Even if you're someone who wouldn't use a pickup truck for what it was built for?  Well, unless you're one of the roughly 3,000 people who DID buy one before it was cancelled after just one year on the market...NO!

So while the Blackwood was a flop, it still set the trend for useless ultra-luxury pickups that have become such a common-sight today.  Believe it or not there is one Lincoln Blackwood in my hometown that's owned by a lady that looks like Roseanne Barr.  It's ALWAYS in the same parking spot outside the local Quiznos.  

Weekend Special- Eagle (1988-1998)

This is the badge that appeared on all Eagle
models during it's 10 year lifespan
(image credit-pinstopin.com)

The Eagle division of Chrysler was formed from the ashes of American Motors Corporation (AMC), which was about to go belly-up (you would think that "Phoenix" would have been more appropriate).  The Chrysler Corporation bought out AMC mostly to acquire the Jeep line of trucks as well a new-ish assembly line in Canada.  These nifty new assets also came with some sour ones, including their out-dated Eagle crossover and a pair of Renault's, the compact Medallion and full-size Premier.  Since Chrysler didn't want any of these cars badged as Chrysler, Dodge or Plymouth, these cars were marketed through a new division called "Eagle," after the former AMC product.  (I've heard rumors that then, Chrysler CEO Lee Iacocca liked the name "Eagle" and was considered a third contributing factor to AMC's buyout.)

The new Eagle division took flight in 1988 and consisted entirely of imported and rebadged models from Renault, Mitsubishi, and other Chrysler models (which would be a continuing theme throughout the brands life).  These cars were sold alongside Jeeps in mostly former AMC dealerships.

An AMC Eagle, which served as the inspiration for the new
Eagle brand.  The Eagle wagon was included in the lineup
for 1988 only.  

From day one, Eagle was more or less a thorn in Chrysler's butt, due mostly in part to the Medallion and Premier being built by Renault, who by that time was more or less shunned by the public and the press due to poor reliability and build quality.  Hell, even mechanics grumble under their breaths whenever a Renault came in because they were so frustrating to work on.  As a result, Chrysler's marketing department didn't put forth much effort into marketing the vehicles.  Bob Lutz, who was in charge of Chrysler's Global Product Development program at the time claimed in his autobiography that the Medallion and Premier were "sales proof," meaning that no matter how attractive and competitive the cars were, there was simply not enough consumer interest to justify giving the cars any marketing attention.  What sucked even more was that Chrysler was forced to sell these cars as part of the AMC buyout agreement.  So they more or less dumped Medallions and Premiers on the showroom floor and waited for an excuse to stop making them, which happened in 1989 when the Medallion was swept under the rug.  The Premier, while also a dust-collector on showroom floors, proved to be more useful to Chrysler, as it would serve as a basis for a future Eagle product.

1990-1994 Eagle Talon

Eagle would take more of a center stage in 1990 when they released the Talon, a sports coupe that was co-developed between Chrysler and Mitsubishi and assembled in Illinois.  The Talon was quite the performer, as it proved popular with the tuner scene (believe me, old beaten up and riced out Talons were a common sight in my high school parking lot).  The vehicle also sold relatively well and even outsold it's Plymouth sibling, the Laser.

1995 Eagle Vision sedan
photo credit-Hyline79 of Wikipedia 

  By 1993, Chrysler became "Renault-free" when they discontinued the Premier.  To fill the full-size car void, Chrysler introduced the "Vision," which was one of three cars built on Chrysler's new LH platform.  What made the Vision as well as it's Dodge and Chrysler siblings unique was it's "cab-forward design" which meant that the wheels were moved to the edges of the vehicle to make the ride much more smoother and the passenger cabin was moved forward to improve visibility.  The Vision was also noted as being the first car that can be equipped with paddle shifters (which were prone to failure).  I also heard that the Vision was the perfect car for going on Vision Quests! (Vision Quest is a movie...you should go watch it...no, there aren't any Eagle Visions in it.)

Aside from the Talon and the Vision, Eagle also sold the Summit sedan and wagon (although the latter looked more like a van than a wagon) compact vehicles. These cars were also built by Mitsubishi and were sold as the Dodge and Plymouth Colt.  The Canadian market had their own unique models, called the Vista and the 2000GTX (which were rebadged versions of the Summit's predecessor).  If I recall correctly, the Summit sedan was the most recent vehicle anyone can buy without an airbag.

Despite having an interesting lineup, Eagle cars never really caught on, mostly for the following reasons:

• The SUV boom was in full swing in the 1990s, and since Eagles shared a showroom with Jeeps, many customers who may have intended on buying an Eagle were swooned away by Jeep's Cherokee and Grand Cherokee.
• As mentioned before regarding the Premier and Medallion, Chrysler never put much effort into marketing the cars.  Whenever an Eagle product was showcased alongside a Dodge, Chrysler, or Plymouth, the Eagle would either be in the back, or partially blocked by the other cars.  
• There wasn't any car that was unique to the Eagle brand.  All their cars were rebadged models from other brands.  And a lot of these cars found themselves competing with its fellow Dodge stablemates.

In 1998, The Chrysler Corporation was bought out by Daimler-Benz.  One of the first orders of business under the new management was to shed unprofitable divisions, and Eagle was at the top of the list (Plymouth would follow three years later).

The 1990-92 Premier I saw in Kenosha

I knew several people over the years who have had Eagle products (mostly Talons, because SPORTS CAR!).  As far as my favorite Eagle car goes, it's actually a tie between the Premier and the Summit van.  As unreliable as it was, the Premier was quite an interesting car.  It was a smooth ride, looked like a BMW, and came in some interesting color choices.  A few months ago, I came across a near mint Premier ES Limited (top of the line) while I was in Kenosha on business.  Have I not been in a rush that day, I would've waited for the owner to return and shook his hand.  I at least snapped a picture, though! Even more ironic was that this particular Premier was parked in a lot that was once the site of the old AMC assembly line.

As far as the Summit van goes, I actually had a personal experience with one.  When I was 2, my family visited Disney World and we were given a red 1995 Summit van as a rental.  My parents praised it's good gas milage  and maneuverability.  My dad especially liked the fact that it did not have a 3rd row back seat (which we would have never used).  Had we not have gotten a new vehicle the year before, we would have definitely considered buying one.  Another unique thing about the Summit was that it can come equipped with all-wheel-drive AND a manual transmission.  I actually have a friend who has been looking under rocks for a stick-shift AWD Summit for years.

An Eagle Summit van similar to the one my parents
rented in Disney World.  

Here's an informative video on what to look out for when buying a new car that uses the Eagle Talon and Vision as examples.

Here's a promo video for the Eagle Summit wagon/van.

P.S-it has just occurred to me that the name of the street that leads up to my town's Police Department is called  "Eagle Summit Drive"...strange